5 Mindset shifts to love networking
Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck found that a person’s mindset plays an important role in determining their success.
In this blog, I am going to explain what a mindset is, the two mindsets that support your success in your career and how to change your mind set for better results in networking. At the end, I will identify 5 mindset shifts that can help you get unstuck and learn to love networking.
What does mindset mean?
Essentially, your mindset consists of your thoughts, attitudes and beliefs about the world. For example, Dweck identified two contradictory sets of thoughts, attitudes and beliefs about intelligence and talent.
First, she identified something she called a growth mindset. This mindset means you believe that intelligence and talents are something that can be developed over time.
Contrast that with what she called a fixed mindset. Here you believe that intelligence and talent are fixed. If you’re not good at something, or you’re lacking talent, well, that’s too bad. It’s fixed and can’t be changed.
Basically, what you see is what you get!
Some examples of fixed and growth mindsets
FIXED MINDSET: That’s just who I am, I can’t change that!
GROWTH MINDSET: I am constantly changing and evolving!
FIXED MINDSET: If I don’t really try, I can’t fail.
GROWTH MINDSET: I really only fail if I stop trying!
I have coached and mentored both kinds of people over time. Often, those with a fixed mindset come to me reluctantly because they know they have to change but their mantra is often, “Well, that’s the way I am. I’ve always been that way.” And then the conversation ends unless I can find a way to challenge their mindset.
Two Mindsets That Support Your Success
Growth Mindset:
As you can imagine, having a growth mindset can have a positive impact on your success on your career. With this mindset, you are more likely to persevere in the face of setbacks. You are hungry to grow and learn. And you strongly believe you can accomplish almost anything you put your mind to.
Of course, you still need to be reasonable. For example, I certainly have a growth mindset, but I am not about to apply to be an astronaut!
I am however, doing the famous 2020 pivot from coaching women who attended in person training, to growing and developing an online business and coaching people like you who want to grow in their professional lives. My ability to persevere means I can be successful. I know that.
A growth mindset means you just don’t give up.
You adjust, you learn, you ask for help, you grow and you just keep going, even if you have to switch gears. You reward yourself for all the actions you take. A growth mindset is all about the process. You celebrate the effort you are putting into something, even if the results have not caught up.
Can you see how important that mindset is for supporting your success with your career?
A Positive Mindset:
Here again, a positive mindset is a gamechanger. And for many reasons. For one, you are just a lot more fun to be around! A negative, complaining and critical mindset can really suck all the air out of a room.
The other way a positive mindset supports you is that it focuses you on the solution and away from the problem. That is really the whole philosophy of life coaching, namely, go to solution. Talk about a solution. Conjure up solutions and get out of the darkness and difficulty of the problem.
The remarkable thing about focusing on the solution, is that you usually find it.
Our brain sees what it is looking for. It’s the Reticular Activating System. The more you look for the solutions, the more likely you are to find them. The more you delve into the problem, the more likely you are to find them…problems.
Your positive mindset will support your success by helping you see opportunities, connections and answers to problems that are invisible to the negative eye!
Mindset hacks to love networking
Your positive mindset will support your success in business by helping you see opportunities, connections and answers to problems that are invisible to the negative eye!
I don't have time for networking
You are the pilot of your life, which means you can decide how much time you invest in networking. So many managers complain that networking consumes so much time. Networking doesn't consume time, networking gives you opportunities to get to know people, projects and knowledge that you didn't have access to before. You decide how much time you spend with whom, there is a time limit, you are not measured. Unless you give yourself goals.
I don't even know what to say
When you go into networking conversations be open to what happens, if you focus too much on a job offer you won't really hear anything else. Active listening is more important than information download. Be focused on what you want to achieve but also give it space and time. We are all human beings!
It's easier to connect with people when you have things in common. I suggest investing some time to find out what connects you to other people. You can find out online or through conversations.
Everyone has something they can share with each other. Newcomers are often reluctant to meet senior leaders. "What can I share?" Let's change perspectives: The training now includes topics that didn't exist when the senior leaders were studying. Other generations grow up with different norms and challenges: That's interesting.
I don't know why I have to network, I hate small talk
This leads me to the next point: Think bigger. I am in favour of female senior leaders actively networking and ensuring to offer role models. So, it's not always just about the job, the current project, but also about something bigger. What do you stand for? Others are looking for mentors, you could be the one.
If small talk makes you absolutely dread it, then change it, make it interesting. How? There are powerful questions in coaching that you can also use in networking. All W-questions, all open questions. I suggest finding out what the topics of conversation could be. What did your interviewee post about, talk about? Above I wrote that you can look for common ground, which is a good point for a real conversation beyond small talk.
I can't just talk to someone!
Everyone can build a relationship with others. I often hear managers say I don't know how to start. My first advice: MINDSET! If you believe you can't that´s what will happen.
Many people find it easier to help than to ask for help. If you think about it, you realize that this is quite selfish. Allow me to ask you a little question: How do you feel when you can help someone? Good? Exactly! Don't be so selfish and allow others to feel the same, to feel good when they have helped. Whom? Well, you!
No one is interested in me
My last mindset shift hack I want to share is this. Don't assume.
Your perception is not reality. If someone doesn't get back to you right away, it may be because they have something else important on their plate, it may be because they are on holiday, it may be because something private has come up. If someone doesn't get in touch, don't assume, don't think it's because of you. Just ask politely. It's always amazing what you get to hear. Take care that your limiting beliefs don´t influence your career negatively, read more in this article.
With this mindset shift, you can really love networking
With this blog and with the blog articles Why you should love networking, Networking isn´t a numbers game and Why networking matters we have prepared ourselves for networking, but how do I build up a network strategically? I'll show you in my course SHOW UP! In the 6-week online group coaching program we talk about exactly that! Because if you are not seen by the right decision-makers, you are: invisible! Here is the link to SHOW UP!
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You cannot know everything there is to know about how to get where you want to be in life. While it’s possible to learn the needed skills, this will take time and likely a lot of money. Instead, what if you had someone (or a group of people) who can help guide you to success?
A mentor is someone who currently is where you want to be. The relationship you have with a mentor can be an official one, or it can be informal such as following in the footsteps of someone you admire. Mentors have experience and have gone through growing pains towards success. They will know what kinds of training you may need or skills to develop.